Monthly Archives: May 2017

7 Ways Adulthood is Better Than We Make It Out To Be

Sure, we complain about how being an adult is terrible, and how we wish we could just move back in with our parents. Life was so simple as a kid! There wasn’t a job we had to have, or a mortgage to pay. We could stay up all night and sleep all day, only to do the same the next day. It. Was. Awesome.

You know what else is awesome? Being an adult. No, seriously, being an adult is actually pretty cool. I promise! Don’t believe me? Read on, my friend, and you’ll see what I’m talking about.

  1. I’m just going to get this right out of the way: adult trips to Disneyland are amazing. I know what you’re thinking, it’s for kids, or you’d feel so bad if you went without your kids. I’m telling you, get over it and just go. It. Is. Amazing.
  2. You are able to see situations for what they are, and you don’t worry about “getting in trouble.” I think when we are younger, we think that mistakes are life or death situations. Make a mistake at work? You’re going to get fired. Make a mistake in public? Here comes the public shaming! As you mature, you realize a couple things: First, our minds make mountains out of molehills. Not everything is a life or death situation, but man alive, we sure treat it as such. Second, no matter what we do, or mistake we made, life moves on. The sun comes up, and everything keeps spinning. Honestly, not having all that heaviness hang over your head sure makes life more entertaining and less stressful.
  3. You get to decide your own truth. This is pretty much a recurring theme in my blog, but no matter how many times I say it, it still rings true: You get to decide what is true for you, and only you get to decide.
  4. And along that same thought, you get to decide what you carry around with you. Were you told when you were younger that you couldn’t sing? So now you’ve grown up thinking you don’t have the talent to sing or create, but you still want to sing! News flash: you get to decide if you’re going to walk around thinking you can’t sing, or if you’re going to belt out your favorite tune. You can decide if you’re going to sign up for singing lessons, or try out for a choir. You also can decide if you’re going to accept someone else’s declaration about you, or if you’re going to throw it out like yesterday’s trash.
  5. Ice cream for brunch while you’re on your adult trip to Disneyland. Try it. You’ll thank me.
  6. You get to be the adult you needed when you were younger. If we were to look back at our childhood, I think there is one adult that stands out from the rest. They were the ones that stood up for us, gave us advice, really listened to our hopes and fears, and weren’t one of our parents. As an adult, you have the opportunity to be that person. You get to essentially look out for the little guy, and show them that someone cares.
  7. I remember years ago telling my dad that “if this is what adulthood is all about, then I’m over it.” He laughed and I’m sure it was because it is a thought just about every adult has when they are in the thick of things. So, how is this awesome? The moment you realize you’re on the wrong path, at the wrong job, with the wrong person, in the wrong restaurant, you have the ability to change the situation. Clearly, leaving a restaurant is way easier than straight up quitting a job, but the fact remains that you are the key piece to the entire thing.

 

Motherhood – Revisited

I had originally written this piece over two years ago.  I wanted to post it because it continues to be applicable to this day.  However, we’re now out of the newborn stage, and are firmly planted in the toddler arena.  As such, I thought and update was in order. [Updates in bold text.]

As time goes on, I find myself reflecting on how motherhood has changed me [We can go ahead and stop talking about change in the past tense. Man alive, already! When does it stop?]. It’s been an interesting adventure thus far, and while I had no idea just how much my life would change with my daughter’s arrival, I can say that I am better off for it [Honestly, most days it depends on the moment you ask me. I mean, I guess I’m better for it. Love makes the world go around, right?].

When you’re pregnant you are often told that your life is going to change forever [BIG understatement]. They make it sound as if that happens the moment your child is born, but in reality, everything changes the moment you know you’re going to have a baby. There are the obvious changes in your surroundings as you prepare for the arrival, however, your body and your mind change instantly. I often said that I felt as if my body was a walking science experiment, and that sentiment holds true even now (post pregnancy hormones are a trip… just sayin’). Mentally, you spend months contemplating not only the responsibility associated with bringing up another human being, but also the excitement of introducing them to the world around them. The moment I realized I was pregnant, my over-active brain instantly started to worry about potty training. I get it: she wasn’t even born yet and I was worried about potty training! Needless to say, I spent months reigning in my tendency to be prepared for anything and everything by figuring everything out years ahead of when the information would be useful [I totally still struggle with this. Put me near a gaggle of tweens with their costume jewelry and tiny purses, and I instantly start to panic.]

You’re also often told that not only will your life change (typically for the better),  but that life will be a bit harder for a while. [I’ve had one person honestly tell me if they had a chance to do it over again, they wouldn’t have had kids. Yikes.] I found that the word “hard,” or even the word “difficult,” doesn’t adequately describe just how hard and difficult things will be. Conversely, just as it seems words don’t exist to accurately describe the level of difficulty we experience with a newborn, the same holds true for when attempting to describe the love and admiration you have for your newborn. The word “love” isn’t enough, and seems incredibly inadequate. [Can I get an AMEN! I’m still trying to figure out word to describe the love I have for my spawn.]

In the end, not only has the birth of my daughter made me brave, kept me on my toes, made me learn to be patient, and forced me to laugh at my Type A ways, her birth has also taught me to live simply and love deeply.  Sure, things were easier when I wasn’t waking up at 3:00 am for our first feeding of the day, but what my life lacks in ease is more than made up by the profound depth my life now holds.

Oh, and I’m convinced that if you can calm a baby that seems to be hell bent on crying at the top of their lungs after you’ve fed them, changed them, and loved them, you can do anything.  [I’d like to add to this by saying if you can calm a screaming kid having a meltdown in the shoe department of a popular big-box store because you have to pay for her new shoes, you can do anything.]

10 Best Songs to Get Stuck in Someone’s Head

They say the reason songs get stuck in our heads is because we can’t finish them. That the mere fact that we can only remember a few words, or a line, from the song keeps our brains on a permanent loop until we latch on to something else.

As kids, my sisters and I would get songs stuck in each other’s heads while we waited for the bus to take us home from the water park. The enjoyment I got out of being so annoying didn’t evaporate once I reached adulthood. Instead, it’s now inflicted on my husband. Here are my favorites:

  1. Mister Rogers theme song
  2. Star Spangled Banner
  3. Theme Song to Doc McStuffins (really, any cartoon on Disney Jr.)
  4. “1234” by Feist (“One, two, three, four/ Tell me that you love me more…)
  5. “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah” from Song of the South
  6. Sesame Street theme song (thanks to the birth of my toddler, I’ve added children’s songs to my list)
  7. “God Bless the USA” by Lee Greenwood
  8. “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond
  9. “Sisters” from White Christmas
  10. “It’s a Small World” by Richard M. Sherman & Robert B. Sherman

I like to think that getting a song stuck in someone’s head is the gift that keeps on giving.

So, if you’re in the mood to be giving (or annoying) feel free to use this list. You just might thank me even if no one else will.

Fun Fact #825: My Parents Don’t Know Everything

And sadly, neither do I.

Could you imagine being in your 20’s and having a child that looks at you like you’re the oracle for every ounce of knowledge known to man? Actually, forget about 20’s. What about your 30’s or even your 40’s? No, thank you.

Oh wait.

I am in my 30’s with a young child that looks at me like I know everything. (Which, if you’re talking to my husband, please remind him that I do, in fact, know everything. Thank you very much.)

Nothing quite reminds you of how you don’t have anything figured out like a pair of big blue eyes staring up at you, asking you why something exists, or why something happened. And the moment they find out you’re just making things up as you go along? *mind blown*

I still remember the day I realized my mom didn’t know everything. Oddly enough, it was over a russet potato.

My family operates on a few things: soda, carbs, starch, and guilt. Growing up, baked potatoes were a staple as a weekend snack, sometimes enjoyed in the middle of the night while watching SNL. Obviously, actually baking the potato was a tad too time consuming, so we opted for the microwave. Each time I was about to pop one in the microwave (that was big enough to cook a turkey, I kid you not), I’d ask my mom how long I should put it in for. She always gave me a time, and I went on my merry way enjoying my lunch.

Then one day, she asked me what I thought the cooking time should be.

Uh, what? Excuse me? I don’t know these things; I’m a child! Gosh!

So, I offered up what I thought would be sufficient, and she told me to try it. It was at that time it dawned on me that she had been guessing the whole time. THE WHOLE TIME. You’d think this would have been the start of many years of me questioning everything she told me, but it wasn’t. Although, I was significantly more suspicious of adults from that point on. (My uncle once told me not to drink coffee because it will put hair on my chest. Being Italian, I was hairy enough and didn’t want to take any chances. Could you imagine if I had I gotten that advice after The Potato Incident? Who knows how hairy I’d be by now.)

Looking back on my childhood, and at the ages my parents were during times of great turmoil for our family, I can only imagine the heartache and stress they were feeling. My parents were in their late 20’s, early 30’s when they divorced and remarried other people. I look back now at how little I knew in my 20’s, and can only imagine how hard it was to lose one family, form a new one, all while having these little faces at you thinking you know everything and will make it all okay.

As my daughter grows up, I’m hoping the day she realizes I don’t know half the things she expects me to won’t be seared into her memory (or if it is, I hope it’s a really funny story). When I look at my own parents now, it is from the perspective of someone that has learned that we are all human and we are all doing the best we can in any given moment. I wasn’t sure I could love my parents more than I already do, but realizing that they too are just human makes me love them even more.